Wanted Review

I saw Wanted tonight.  Making fun of the movie with my friends after watching it was a much more enjoyable experience than sitting through the movie itself. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not hard to watch.  If you’re going to see a movie purely for action, I guess you’ll enjoy it.  I, however, think it’s much more enjoyable to watch something like The Matrix, where the substance of the movie isn’t just a bunch of unrealistic gimmicks.  And if you’re going to see a movie just for action, see last year’s Shoot ‘Em Up.  At least that film knew it was being ridiculous. And Clive Owen is a badass.

Here’s a little bit of what I heard outside the theater:

“The best part of the movie was seeing Angelina Jolie’s ass.”  - Barak Karavani

“The movie basically takes everything ridiculous you wanted to put in other action movies but couldn’t, for fear of ruining those films.” - Ryan Tang

The script itself is ridiculous.  I know it’s based on a graphic novel, but a little more effort into making things more coherent would have been nice. Sure, I guess I’ll grant them the fact that they’re in a fraternity of assassins that has been around for 1000 years and they can bend bullets because it’s in their blood. Okay.  But here’s what I found to be too ridiculous.  I’ll keep out the “plot twist.” 

• The premise of the movie is that these assassins read names out of a magic loom.  The loom continuously weaves patterns that make a secret code that the assassins interpret.  So they aren’t choosing who to kill.  Fate is.  And it’s telling them this through a magical loom, which never runs out of thread.  I’m not saying I don’t believe this couldn’t happen.  Of course it couldn’t.  It’s a movie—it places us in a different world.  I just find the whole concept laughable.
• The main character, played by James McEvoy, decides that the best way to get into a building is to tie tiny bombs to thousands of rats and release them into a building via a garbage truck while the best assassins in the world shoot at him.
• A character tries to communicate with McEvoy by shooting him.  Then McEvoy takes out the bullet and researches where it was made so he can meet him.  A simple letter or phone call would have worked, I think.
• The film ends with James McEvoy staring into the camera and basically telling us all we’re pathetic.  His last words, staring right at the camera are “What the fuck have you done lately?”  Eh, I don’t really like the condescending attitude, McEvoy.  You don’t know what I’ve fucking done lately.  I could have done a lot of shit.  I could be Bill Gates.

The film certainly has its moments.  But it’s not deserving of the praise that people are giving it.  More cutting edge and better than The Matrix? Of course not.  Watch it for free or something.